Written by Shirlee McCoy
February 16, 2012
Jennifer, mom to the cutest twin boys ever, has a real heart for waiting children with albinism. She's compiled a list of boys who are waiting for families and sent it to me. I plan to advocate for all these gorgeous guys, but today, I have to tell you about the one who has broken my heart.
Let's call him Wesley.
Wesley was born in August 2000. For six years, he lived with his family. They cared for him, loved him, nourished him and then, on August 24, 2006, they left him at the gate of an orphanage. I don't know why. I won't even speculate. If you've read my post on the photo you understand my feelings on the subject. Whatever the reasons, the choice was made. Six-year-old Wesley was brought from the place where he had lived as someones son to a place where he was no one's. In his growth report, the stage is set, the scene described with a wording that will haunt me until I know that this young man has finally found a family who will love him.
You see, in the growth report, it says that an employee of the orphanage found "a boy whom no one cared for" at the gate.
A boy whom no one cared for.
No one.
I know the interpretation of the words is off. That, more than likely, the writer was simply saying that Wesley was alone without a supervising adult.
But, I have read many of these growth reports, and I have never seen one interpreted like this.
It is the deepest desire of the human heart to know love, to feel it and to pour it out. We all want to be cared for. We long for connection and intimacy. We long to be known and understood and accepted. To not have that is to be denied the most basic of human needs.
And, there he was, a little six-year-old boy. No note. No explanation pinned to his shirt. Nothing but his orange-blond hair and blue eyes and handsome face. A boy whom no one cared for.
There is no hint as to what he told the police. No glimpse into what he was feeling or thinking. From that moment until now, he becomes what he was at that gate. A boy whom no one cared for.
Wesley's paperwork was processed and he appeared on the shared list in 2008. At that point, he was still young and cute and little. For three years, Wesley has been on that list. He is now 11.5. His twelfth birthday is looming. At fourteen, he will always and only be that boy at the gate of the orphanage.
How awful that children like Wesley have clocks ticking over their heads, little invisible time pieces that people use to determine how easy or safe or lovable these children will be. I am not judging. I am guilty of the same. We had no intention of adopting a child older than five. That we did is a matter of grace. My life would not be as full without Cheeky in it. Loving her has been as easy as breathing, and knowing her has changed me for the better.
I think Wesley will be that change for one blessed family. I think he will be sunshine and warmth and joy. He is described as sensible and gentle, polite and easy to get along with. He loves playing outside and gets along well with his peers. He is healthy and, aside from the visual impairment that goes along with albinism, all findings on his physical exam are normal.
Yet...he waits. The boy whom no one cared for.
It is a thing I can not fathom.
And it breaks my heart.
