Hey there,

I've been thinking about you this morning. I've been thinking about how I know that you want to feel good and important and loved. I know that you're looking for it everywhere, overturning stones and peeking into the eyes of the people in your sphere, wondering aloud, am I worthy? Am I good enough? Do you love me?

It's like that children's book, Are You My Mother?, where the the small bird tumbles from the next and begins to ask every animal in it's path, are you my mother?

Except you are the small bird, tumbling through your life, looking for something to latch onto, and hoping that your brilliance, your beauty will be acknowledged by the world around you. I know all too well what being that small bird feels like - scared, worried, unworthy, sad.

In case you were feeling that way today, Iwanted to tell you this: You are brilliant. You are beautiful. You are worthy.

Your worth does not exist in the kind, affirming word of a friend, or in the promotion that you're hoping for at work. When you question your own worth, or are temporarily unable to tap into the brilliance of your being, the frenzy begins.

We will see that external approval at all costs. Of course! How could we not? We want to be good, we want to be loved. We are hungry for it.

We desperately want to belong, to be recognized for what we hope to be true - that there is something wonderful and lovable about us. We want it so badly that we whip ourselves up into a fever about the things that we attach our validation to.

Will that guy call back? I hope he calls back. What if he DOESN'T call back? He hates me. I should have worn different shoes. My shoes were totally stupid. Who wears shoes like that on the first date?! I wouldn't call someone back with such little taste either. God, I really hope he calls.

I need this job. If I just get this job EVERYTHING will be better. I will have the cash to buy a new car. I NEED a new car. This is the only job in the world for me - if I don't get it there is something seriously wrong with me. I am such a failure. Good things never happen to me. I won't get the job.

I have a full docket of clients. I am such a good person. See! Everyone loves me. They totally "liked" that post on Facebook. I am good at what I do. I deserve to be making an income doing what I love. What?! NO LITTLE HEARTS ON THAT LAST INSTAGRAM PHOTO?! I suck. Seriously, no one even gives a shit about anything that I say. I am a huge failure. I should just give up on my dreams and get a desk job. It was stupid to believe that it was possible anyway.

If I get an A+, then I will make the dean's list, and if I make the Dean's List - my mother will be so proud of me. She won't care that I'm fat. Maybe I won't care that I'm fat? Ok, if I get an A+, get on the Dean's List, AND lose 30 pounds, then she will love me. Then I will love me. Then everything will be so much better.

Hear me when I say this: You are already good. You are good in this body, in this moment, in this job or lack of job, with this amount of cash in your bank account, in this relationship or lack of relationship. You are good right now.

No one can take that away from you. Not with a negative comment, angry conversation, or lack of invitation to their super cool party. In fact, you also can't take that away from yourself - no matter how much you beat up on yourself or speak unkindly.

You are already good.

But, believing this, and untangling your gorgeous nature from all of the distractions and obstacles that you attached it to requires practice. When you are looking for a quick fix or someone else to tell you that you are good enough - you will always be hitching self-worth to the next email, the next relationship, the next client, the next A+.

What would it be like to carry the knowledge of your own worth with you, always?

Believing this requires getting to know yourself - the real you, the one that is patiently waiting for you to give up the frenzy and begin to notice your own inner beauty. You are resilient. You are resourceful. But, you have been confused. When you've been seeking validation everywhere external - you have been forgetting the fact that you have the power to provide that validation, that love for yourself.

That love you're craving? Embody it. How can you be loving towards yourself today?

That celebration of your brilliance that you're waiting for? Girl, TODAY is your day - how do YOU want to celebrate?

You've got this. I believe in you. I believe in your brilliance.

Want help with this? Hit reply to this email. Let's chat.

Love,
Mara

Want to work on claiming your own gorgeous brilliance with me and a group of similarly phenomenal women? There are still some seats left for Body Loving Homework Live - learn more here.